Emotional intelligence. Our society has become so good at thinking and solving problems in a logical way that we have ignored the emotional side of being human.
The message your feelings and emotions send you are simply providing you an understanding of the things that are going on around you and often the things that are going on inside you. Pay attention to our emotions and learn the message that they are sending. (Ignoring them is like covering your ears when your spouse or friend want to tell you something important.)
Over time, the internal pressure of unresolved emotion builds, causing seemingly sane, well-adjusted people to explode and often at the most inopportune moments.
Get inspired. Render your emotions, feel the mystery, passion, beauty, and power of what it means to be fully human—experience it—just let go. Linda Kohanov, whose research of how animals use emotions as information, inspires me. Horses are models of emotional agility. In her book the Power of the Herd, Linda outlines a brilliant method of using emotions as information.
- Feel emotion in its purest form.
- Understand the message behind the emotion.
- Change something in response to the message.
- Go back to grazing—let the emotion go—get back on task, return to enjoying life.
We are designed to feel, to have emotions and need each other. We need to back away from our thinking and our thoughts and allow ourselves to feel. To understand our feelings and our emotions is to create a place of understanding. If we understand what we are feeling, we make better choices. When you learn to use emotion as information, you don’t actually look emotional, at least not in the classic sense. You appear engaged, thoughtful, and present.
Over time, you literally lose your fear of fear itself, gaining the ability to calm and focus others in situations that would normally breed panic and conflict. And finally, because you no longer waste energy suppressing emotion, you free your body, mind, and spirit for creative pursuits and innovative solutions to problems that overwhelm others. When you understand YOUR emotional architecture, your passion for life and work becomes contagious. You become the creator and not the reactor to the life that surrounds you. You become the architect of your emotions, your thoughts and the direction that you want to go. I have seen this in my own life. And, after creating emotional balance, I can tell you dreams can come true.